where the heart is

How to Use Apostrophes

Another blogger asked me about this last week, so I decided to dedicate this week’s Writerly Wednesday to apostrophes. This little piece of punctuation seems to trip a lot of writers up, so let’s look at scenarios in which you would, or would not, use an apostrophe.

Mommy Brain Strikes Again

A long time ago, in a kitchen far, far away…

Actually, it was five years ago, and the kitchen was in my old house, about two miles from where I’m sitting now. Yeah. I’ve really gone places. 

All I had to accomplish was one phone call. My daughter, S, was sick. Who knows what she had, but I had a newborn, a sick kid, and an addled brain that had been ravaged by a constant barrage of Disney and unanswerable questions. (People think Mommy Brain is hormonal, but have you ever considered the collective brilliance that would come from the world’s population of moms if they no longer had to come up with intelligent answers to “What color is a princess’s fart?”)

Interview with the Blogger: Frances Taylor, Whinge Whinge Wine

Have you ever wondered, “What makes smart ass writers want to inflict their inner ramblings on the rest of the world?” Perhaps you’ve read my blog and thought, “Is this real? How does all this crazy shit happen to one person?”

(Answers: 1. Narcissism 2. Yes. 3. Beats me.)

Now that we’ve got that out of the way, I have some questions for my fellow humor bloggers. (Do you mind? It is my blog, after all.) 

Working from Home…With Children! 26 Parents Share Their Best Tips

Today is my birthday! Yippee! I’m not going to tell you my age, but I WILL tell you what my wonderful husband is getting me. A WHOLE DAY to myself! That’s right. I’m taking my Mac Book to Starbucks, and I’ll be writing, reading, or Facebooking ALL DAY! 

If you’re a work-at-home-mom, I don’t need to tell you how valuable this is. Working from home with kids around is hard, especially in the summer time when there’s no school to dump them off on. 

This Sports Bra Is Proof that Manufacturers Don’t Get Boobs

What is it about boobs that gets clothing manufacturers and designers all flustered? As any woman with breasts larger than a B cup can tell you, all women’s clothing appears to be designed for small-breasted women. When I shop for clothes, I can’t just pick out anything that looks cute. Buttons in the front? Can’t wear it, unless I want to show off my bra through the buttonholes. Backless? Nope. Strapless? Sure, if I want to demonstrate my circus-like ability to touch my belly button with my nipple.