Why Are Doctors Always Surprised that I’m Not an Idiot?

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Here are a few typical examples of conversations that I’ve had with many doctors over the years.

Convo #1

Doc: Sometimes you have to get re-vaccinated for Hepatitis B because your immunity wanes over time. It’s like the flu shot. You have to get that every year.

Me: But that’s because the flu virus changes every year.

Doc: OMG how did you know that? Are you a nurse?

Me: No, I’m just a smart person.

Convo #2

Doc: You don’t show any signs of having liver problems.

Me: You mean because I’m not jaundiced?

Doc: Yes! OMG, how could you possibly know the symptoms of liver damage?

Me: Doesn’t everyone know what jaundice is? I’m pretty sure my 10-year-old knows that.

Convo #3

Doc: I want you to take this nasal spray for your allergies.

Me: What’s the FDA pregnancy category for that drug?

Doc: Holy $&*! How do you know about FDA pregnancy categories?! Did you go to my medical school?

Me: No, I’ve just been pregnant a gajillion times. Are your other patients all stupid or something?

**NOTE: CONVO #3 TOOK PLACE A VERY LONG TIME AGO! I HAVE ENOUGH KIDS, THANKS!

Maybe because I'm not stupid_

Anyway. Here’s my question: Why do doctors always react this way to somewhat intelligent questions? I’m displaying basic knowledge that I could’ve learned on TV. Or from previous doctor visits. Or just graduating from the D.A.R.E. program in 1984. (Cum laude. Not to brag.)

Seriously, have you ever met a pregnant woman who didn’t know about FDA pregnancy categories? I mean, I guess it’s possible that someone sits through all her OB appointments with her fingers in her ears singing “lalalala” because pregnancy is icky and she doesn’t want to hear any health information. She’s probably taking aspirin and eating soft cheeses in my doctor’s lobby every morning, giving the rest of us a bad name. THANKS, LADY!

Have you guys ever experienced something like this? Is it just me? Or do doctors expect all of their patients to not know anything whatsoever?

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2 comments

  1. My doctors usually just sigh. They realize that these days, everyone can look up everything on the internet and no one takes medical advice at face value. I still listen to my doctors, of course, but not without verifying what I’ve been told first – and I have refused medications or treatment based on information I’ve researched independently.

    Liked by 2 people

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